Cellphones in Court as Evidence

I don’t pick my nose it public because I’m scared of technology. That electricity pole might have a hidden camera. Traffic lights turn amber, red and green. Do they? Maybe there’s a camera the mayor  installed in there, without City Council approval.

It’s worse indoors. Every room is bugged, especially offices, hotel rooms and restaurants where you have a ‘special table.’ Men who have such tables have a lot of money tied to special interests, that are legit or not. Someone is always recording what they say and they in turn, spy on ‘business’ partners.

Because every room is wired for sound, you must learn how to swim, if you don’t want your conversation to end up in court as evidence. Set up meetings in a swimming pool so that you can discuss volatile information between breast strokes and back strokes. Both parties are wearing shorts so there’s no place to hide a mic. Are there water proof microphones?

Swimming pools are ideal because most hotels have them. High seas are the next option. You can swim at the water’s edge and discuss business. Don’t go too far inside the sea because a baby shark sent by your enemies might rip off your lying heart. Special men with special tables are in the public eye. There are cameras lurking everywhere and that might be used as evidence in court. No problem, but you cannot be accused of threats or hatching insidious plans because only seagulls heard what you said.

Wait. What if there are waterproof microphones the ‘business’ partner can hide in his hair? No problem. He’s bald like you. The morale of the story is: there are microphones everywhere. Be careful what you say to such partners and loved ones, definitely loved ones. Some women do not hesitate to destroy men online once love is gone, so be careful with promises and the phrase: I love you.

By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.