Lazy Bugger

Spinach has a lot of water, so chop potatoes small, small and throw them in.

Lazy bugger, that’s me.

Because I’m too lazy to do laundry, I prefer buying black pants, shirts, T-s and dresses, but I draw the line with sleepwear. I won’t be caught dead sleeping in black P.J’s or nightie. Aah! Aah! Let’s reserve that for my funeral: black coffin, bye bye attire they’ll choose for me, and mourners to send me off will be dressed to kill, in black. Oops! Not exactly.

Kitchens also have black appliances like microwaves, dishwashers and stoves. Because I’m a lazy bugger, I was happy with the new stove. It’s black, which means less cleaning, so I thought. This thing has more evidence of dirt than incriminating evidence in all Donald Trump’s cases. A drop of steam from a lid bham! It sits on the stove. I’m serving food and some peas try a get-away and bham! It lands on the stove. It leaves a mark.

Then there’s dust. Fine I didn’t wipe the stove yesterday so what? I wonder where that dust comes from. Aggravation. That’s the name of this black stove. They must bring back white stoves. This stove reminds me of mama who didn’t have time for lazy buggers. She would bring you to the dirty object and ask you a question.

“Is there something wrong with your eyes?”

“Sorry mama.”

That’s why I can’t ignore spills on this stove, but it’s pretty after I’ve cleaned it with good old water and an old dish cloth or sponge.

Nonqaba waka Msimang

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