Rejection
Rejection. We are rejected with harsh words or physically, by being pushed out of the room and doors shut in our face. Being ignored is also rejection. Fall is here, kids are back to school. You can pick out new kids, all alone anxiety written all over their faces. That’s why most parents send younger ones to schools attended by big brother, sister or cousins.
‘I’m leaving.’
We expect people to protest and say it’s too early to leave the party or some fun place. We feel rejected if they don’t utter a word, just look at us and go on with what they’re doing. In one Yoruba movie, Odunlade Adekola, a Nigerian producer, director and song writer told his friends he was leaving. They ignored him. He kept moving towards the door, repeating the intended departure. Nobody said anything. He knew something was wrong.
It also happens between lovers. Love comes and goes like waves on the shore. Sometimes waves don’t come back and the man shows the woman he no longer loves her. She knows because the writing is always on the wall. Finally he says: ‘I’m leaving.’ No reaction. Being ignored is rejection because it is like a knife through butter. It is final. There are no potholes to be filled, no opportunity to justify his leaving because she doesn’t care.
That quiet treatment is even worse when living under someone’s roof. Being ignored means it’s time to look for another hole to hide your head, preferably your own place. It’s your place, no matter how small.
By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.
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