It's Hard Being a Man

It’s hard to be a man. Sisters next door and across blue seas, please don’t lance me. It’s the headlines. A 19 year-old basketball player faints in practice and dies two days later. A 24 year-old musician from a rich home commits suicide. A 20 year-old influencer is found dead in his apartment.  

Maybe I should say it’s hard to be a young man in 2023, because you are supposed to have the world at your feet, and not underground in your grave. Suicide is a secret people take to the grave, so do young men that are healthy today and die in a week’s time. Parents grieve longer because it is just hard to process the why? The answer is in the cellphone because that’s where we all live, but no parent will violate the privacy of a son that just died, by going through his phone.

It’s hard to be a man is actually a Zulu proverb: ku-nzima u-kuba indoda. Frequent headlines about suicide and mysterious death of influencers, actors, musicians and young sportsmen made me think about what Deion Sanders said recently. He is the American football coach known as ‘Coach Prime.’

Sanders is famous for motivational speeches to kids under his watch, first at Jackson State University where he was head football coach, and now Colorado University Boulder. When the team took a break, he wished them well but warned them not to let 30 seconds or five minutes of pleasure ruin the rest of their lives. The exact quote is online. I just paraphrased it.

It’s hard to be a man like his players because of the halo. Their future looks bright and some might play in the NFL one day. That’s why Deion Sanders gave them blunt advice about the disadvantages of being young, athletic and handsome. He doesn’t want them to be, tomorrow’s headlines.

By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.