No Question is Harmless
No question is harmless, especially in games male and female species play. It starts with a simple question. What’s your name? Sounds harmless, especially if it is broad day light with people milling about. More questions might give the wrong impression that the male is interested, only to discover days later that he has a sinister motive.
This blog was prompted by a movie I saw about an ex-soldier and a man she met while jogging in a park. They kept bumping into each other and questions followed. In hind sight, one particular answer nearly cost her, her life. She said she jogs in the morning, when the park is not crowded. The man belongs to a kidnapping ring that drugs girls and videotapes them while men abuse them. Based on that answer, her newly-found jogging friend came with an accomplice and tried to kidnap her. She fought them off, using her army training and had them arrested.
This brings us to answers we give strangers, or people we upgrade from stranger to friend-in-progress. At what point, do we do the upgrade? Maybe it’s perceived common interests. My heart beat wildly when they tried to kidnap the ex-soldier because I had thought that he was genuinely into health and fitness, as she was.
In that movie, questions were asked when they were jogging in a park. It could be at a coffee shop or the beach. It depends on the woman I guess. Some welcome the attention. Others find certain questions intrusive and walk away. These are the women that understand that there is nothing like a harmless question.
“Do you live alone?”
“Oh! You have a daughter? How old is she?”
Harmless questions? I don’t think so. He is a stranger.
Nonqaba waka Msimang
Executive Blogger
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