Marriage But Phone Still Private

Ringtone goes off like waves. Husband answers his phone. After the call I say: Who was that?

A marriage certificate does not give partners the right to question incoming calls, let alone touch someone’s phone and go through text messages and phone history.

I’ve seen many movies where couples go for counselling before they get married. Some churches insist on it, but do they have a module on cellphones? They should because it can cause friction between the two.

I saw one movie where the wife smelt a rat because the husband changed his phone’s password. They used to know each other’s passwords. That must be quite a unique arrangement. Sharing phone passwords? People living together don’t even share online banking information.

Who was that? It’s a question married couples used to ask when the home phone rang. It belonged to everyone under that roof. Calls were mostly home related because of joint responsibility like doctors, schools, cable, the boss, the city or grandparents.

Couples have these numbers on their phones now, but there is still a chunk that contains private calls. He doesn’t have to know. She doesn’t have to know. Trying to police partners’ phone calls and reading text messages can lead to heart failure. You cannot stress over why your partner leaves the room to answer calls.

You are married or living together, but the cellphone is off limits. It will always be private, like going to the bathroom to do your business.

By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.