Nonqaba said ...

Photo Credit: online pic. Yes, 25 hours a day is pushing it, but sometimes we think an extra hour will solve personal and world problems. African Americans invented the saying 24/7, which means all the time: 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Like all black invention, they are not given credit. The general rule is, no copyright for all things black, from both Africa and America. Anyone can appropriate the black genius, copyright and monetize it. But wait, why do we need an extra hour? Surely, 24 hours a day is enough. We are usually pancake tired at the end of the day. Truth is, it’s a cop-out. We are disorganized, despite organizers in our phones and four other devices inside handbags and at home. It is when things go wrong that we wish we have  25, instead of 24 hours, and please don’t blame traffic or Wi-Fi.  It’s human nature. We would rather steal something online, than come up with a unique presentation for a business pitch. To top it all, we don’t learn from our mistakes. Example. T

Canada the entity, feels lonelier on July 1. Why? Because it is a federal holiday called Canada Day.  Lonelier because the entity (country) does not have grout that binds patriotism tiles like other entities.  France has Bastille Day. Spain has All Saints Day. Sweden has Midsommardagen .  United Arab Emirates has E id Al Fitr .  Lesotho, in Africa has King Moshoeshoe’s Day . Canada the entity envies these countries because they have longstanding cementing agents such as language, religion, geography, history or struggle for independence.  Canada is not solid, like floor tiles joined by grout. It is like confetti which does not lose its colors when it hits the ground.   Canada, the entity has people from all over the world who embraced it, to free themselves from religious, cultural and economic roadblocks but still refer to the countries they left behind as, home.  Cellphone and landline companies can go bankrupt if Canadians stopped making telephone calls to Africa, Asia and Europe. O

  “I lost my phone.” Pandemonium. The world comes to a standstill. We literally cannot move because the phone, our steering wheel is immobilized. It’s not the hardware as such, but phone numbers inside: schools, the child minder, the boss, sisters and all human beings we lean on, to live. We need back-up. We go crazy because we don’t know the numbers by heart. We are brain dead. We use the speed dial feature on the phone for people we call often, but we don’t know those numbers by heart. I once froze for a minute when a service provider asked for my number. She noticed the hesitation. I made a joke, while trying to remember the new number that came with the new phone. ‘I don’t call myself.’   The joke fell flat. Phones have replaced the brain, so we need back-up and kids can provide that. Let me qualify that, kids who don’t have a phone, yet. Their brain is still fresh as spring, and the most important thing is, they are at that stage where they find people fascinating. That is why we

Change for the better? Not the environment. I don’t have time to monitor the extent of climate change. In fact, if it hadn’t been for the pandemic and wearing masks, I would not have noticed that the air is contaminated. I’m too busy you know, making money, trying to make money or having sleepless nights about money, to notice signs that climate change is here, dividends from our investment in change, all kinds of change. Money is the change agent. It enables rich men to change wives or go and buy temporary ones on the corner, when they feel like a change. Money makes change possible: the car, boat, house, air conditioners, humidifiers, facial cream to arrest rude ageing, Botox affected areas, buy new phones, laptops, television, microwave ovens, fridges and clothes. Change for the better doesn’t apply to climate change because it has a multiplier effect on other things humans need to survive. Nature has in-built medication to heal wounds of little boys that fall off their bikes. Sprin

The government of Canada, like all governments, does not want to tell citizens bad news. They feel our weak mental constitution cannot bear it. Funny though, when it comes to health issues like COVID-19, it provides information that convince us to play ball, for example, vaccinate en masse . But the government doesn’t tell us why we are in the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO), a Europe ‘watch my back’ thing formed in 1949, after World War 2. Oh! Let me guess, Britain. Canada was a British colony, so it had no alternative. It was an, all in the family situation. We shall ignore that. However, we will not ignore NATO putting pressure on Justin Trudeau to increase Canada’s defence spending to 2% of the national gross domestic product (GDP). Don’t ask me what the GDP is. I don’t fully understand it. What I know, is that the 2% is part of the money the government deducts from paychecks and from toothpaste, which I’m using to represent everything we buy.  But Canada signed on the do

In Britain it is a crime to hold someone against his will, steal his land and family and imprison him if he doesn't obey the kidnapper's demand. Such crime did not apply in British colonies. It was called civilization. Britain still rules the world in one way or the other. It left Europe’s family of nations called the European Union (EU) because too many people were fleeing their countries. Their strategy was to first land in some EU country, but the destination was London England. Britain, the country that stole almost half the world through the barrel of a gun, mined its minerals, polluted rivers, put indigenous people in chains and residential schools, did not like that strategy, so it cut all ties with the EU. It left the EU, but it did not leave G7. It will never leave because Britain, U.S., Canada, Germany, Italy, France and Japan form the G7 cult that controls the world through finance.  There is nothing new about G7 meetings. The first one was on the Scramble for Africa

Photo Credit: online pic. G7 countries had their meetings in various countries in June and recycled old press releases about cooperation and climate change. The only new thing was Ukraine and Russia. America sent out the memo that Ukraine must be helped. Russia must be squeezed economically.  Biden should ask previous presidents about American foreign policy. They’ll advise him that it is a no-go area. It is pre-ordained, pre-paid, pre-approved. No new president can change the America   Russia tug-of-war. No two bulls can live in one kraal. So, what is the solution? The two countries divided the world into spheres of influence. Why is America pulling the strings in G7 countries? B ecause it saved Europe  from Adolf Hitler during World War 2, while Russia has the grandfather clause on countries like Ukraine. The world is mad at Vladimir Putin for invading Ukraine. Equally, he is mad at America for trying to sneak into his sphere of influence through the back door, which is Ukraine. The

Legitimate expenses in budgets depend on two things, whether they are DIY budgets based on our no-good salaries or wages, or we pay accountants to prepare them. Accountants are folks that handle other people’s money because it is too much.  Thinking about it gives them migraines. Richard Branson used to lounge on his private island and enjoy nature, before the September 2017 Hurricane Irma that ravaged the Caribbean, gave him sleepless nights. Poor people have more legitimate expenses than the rich: rent or mortgage, sending kids to college, health insurance, food, and transport. Transport in particular becomes a headache, when the family car says enough is enough and breaks down. Millionaires have accountants that include illegitimate expenses in the budget to hide a few dollars from the taxman. Maybe we should say billionaires. Millionaires are stale  news. Billionaires do lunch and charge it to their expense accounts.  Poor people use credit cards to buy milk and rice because their

Insurance is an admission of guilt that something will go wrong. We hear it when we buy new phones or computers. Why should I pay an extra $189 extra for a new phone? In case something goes wrong says the sales assistant. This is tech robbery because the onus is on the manufacturer to make a product that is not faulty. That is why the phrase new from the box,  is supposed to be reassuring. Imagine millions of customers taking up the insurance. That $189 adds up which means the intention is to fund future phones, which will be better but will also need insurance, more than $189 because of the passage of time. Insurance is also an admission of guilt when capitalism interferes with nature, like sending men down mine shafts or down the North Sea to drill for oil. Billionaires get insurance for their investment on the understanding that something might go wrong. I don’t know if that insurance covers workers, or not. Car insurance is understandable because of human nature. We drink and drive

Who am I? I’m just a pawn in advertisers’ chess game. Microsoft and I are in a relationship. Sort of. That is why it sneaked in a message that I should help it tailor some advertising. Should I? I mulled over it. The mulling stopped when I remembered the tail end. ‘ This data is never associated with your device. ’ Are you kidding me? Of course it is. Everything is. You’ll think that your date of birth is harm less. It isn’t. It’s an advertising pawn. They also want to know my phone number. For what? It’s not in the public domain but advertisers still call me from Ontario, India, Malaysia, all over the globe. Chats? How do these people get my number? Chats? My foot! Talking about my feet. Sometimes I get on the bus, to go and pick up warm bread from the bakery. Guess what? I now get ads from a restaurant on the bus route. How? I’ve never been there before. I rest my case. Now, I never worry about technology because it is pointless, like shouting at the sun. But, I have my ways of avoid

England fought in World War 1 and 11 because it had soldier slaves from  Africa. The U.N. must make sure it never happens again. I f you belong to the lower class in peace time, you’ll die as one in the  up- coming World War 3. This is based on two messages, profits and patriotism. During peace time, workers must understand that the economy comes first. For example, they lose their jobs because of technology or when investors move operations to Africa and Asia for cheaper wages. The wartime message is different. It invokes patriotism. Workers must go to the war to fight for their country. The upper class benefit from both messages because they script them. They are the boss during peace time and war. Take the two World Wars for example. The British upper class that had plantations in the Caribbean, country estates, town houses and titles that made them sit in the House of Lords , were majors and brigadiers. They drank whisky and pored over military plans on how to attack Germany and it

What American women feared has come to pass. The Supreme Court has overturned Roe vs. Wade, the 1973 Supreme Court ruling affirming a woman’s right to access safe abortion. Is it possible that in the year 2022, certain states in the U.S. still regard women as property?   The highest law in the land says yes. They are men’s property if they have no say in what goes in and out of their bodies. It is  deja vu , when women could not open a bank account without male permission. However, the right to abortion is not a banking matter. It is a right men can relate to. Vasectomy for example. A man’s decision not to have kids is his decision. It is not criminalized. States that vote Republican cannot stop him. Indeed, he doesn’t have to wait years for the U.S. Supreme Court to decide the matter. The Supreme Court’s decision on Roe vs Wade demonstrates remnants of hypocrisy. What took maybe 30 seconds for the sperm to land  during sex , is the woman’s hand luggage for nine months. Through vasecto

Caesar salad. Did that Roman emperor really eat this salad? Photo credit: online pic. Restaurants are fed up. They are considering a minimum charge of $50 to get a table. They are tired of losing money because we order green salad and water, and call it ‘eating out.’ Eating is a contact sport. Teeth must come into contact with something, not just two sticks of asparagus. We might think teeth are the major player but they are not. Taste buds stand up straight like a man happy to see his girlfriend. They send messages to the brain that the food is well travelled (in the pot, grill or oven). Diners' faces lit up. Servers smile in anticipation of a constructive tip, and restaurant owners are relieved they will be able to pay the rent and the city levy. Tired of chicken? Try salmon, it's cheaper than a T-bone steak. Restaurants are serious about charging the $50 minimum levy because they cannot go on like this, people eating green or Caesar salad for three hours. Other diners have n

Felix Auger-Aliassime, born and raised in Quebec Canada. Photo credit, online pic.  It is an old feud. English vs French. It is still the bone of contention in Quebec, one of the Canadian provinces, where French is the official language. The French and English are perpetually playing language tennis. Players on both sides of the net expect the ball to travel to and fro in their own language. French speakers accuse English speakers of arrogance. British tourists cross the Channel, and expect to be served in English on arrival. The French say non , you are in France, parlez  some French. That is what French do when they visit London or Dublin: speak English. The British can be very arrogant. I was reluctant about my first trip to France during my student days. Don’t worry, everybody speaks English, said my friends. It was arrogance alright and I should know. I was born in the southern part of the Equator, and teachers caned us for speaking Zulu, Xhosa or Sesotho. I ignored my friends and

No air miles. That was my response when cashiers asked me if i collected them. They don’t anymore. A news report I read this week explains why. Apparently, some grocery stores have ditched the AIR MILES partnership, where I collect points for buying olive oil or mango juice. I don’t have air miles because Mathematics is a foreign language.  I was never good in numbers. That is why I quashed the idea of being an investment banker very early in life.  I understand you can invest in cornfields before the soil is turned up or pork bellies even before a baby pig is born. That is how I view air miles, investing in tomorrow or the unknown. I’m the dumb one. Some people understand this air miles’ thing so well, I overheard one customer saying: I can even convert my points into cash. Points and air miles are the same thing in Canada and the U.S.  Drugstores or clothing stores even give you a card to collect points. O.K. I admit it.  Math is not my thing but what I know for sure is that Air Mile

Flying somewhere this summer? It’s interesting to watch how miserable we look at airports as we approach check-in. We should be wearing happy faces, in anticipation of the sun and blue oceans. I don’t like flying. I don’t like taking off my clothes in public.   Airlines are concerned about safety and I respect them for that, but I don’t like taking off my socks at airports.  They might have holes which I hadn’t noticed.  Worse still they might not be laundry fresh. I don’t like flying.  Delayed or canceled flights are no problem.  They are part of the territory, but taking my computer off its bag, taking off my hat, throwing keys on that tray and spreading my arms so that strangers can scan my body with electronic baseball bats is not my cup of tea.  My worse experience was at the Dubai International Airport where security handled us like goats, shouting orders.  Safety is a priority yes, but what happened to my nail files and small scissors airport security confiscated in the past?  D

Cricket in Barbados. Photo credit, online pic. Baseball and cricket players have never been in prison, unless they manage to hide it. How do they put it America? He’s doing time. These two  games take a lot of time, because they take almost the whole day.  Do they have overtime like basketball and soccer? I don’t think so. Take baseball for example. I suppose it will be difficult to determine the length of the game, because sometimes men holding the bat send the ball to heaven, to the roof. It is called a home run. Do they ever find them? I suppose it is a case of ball left home, never to return. Baseball drama also takes a lot of time, with players from opposite teams giving each other mean looks and the catcher giving sign language to the man ready to dish the ball, to the man on bat. Baseball and cricket are the same game. What? Don’t you dare! Cricket is an upper class game. They even have that famous stadium called Lord’s Cricket Ground. It is in  St. John’s Wood, a London suburb

COVID-19 is gone. Is it? We are a bit relaxed this summer. Very few people wear masks inside public places and we have kicked social distancing to the curb. What makes us so confident? Mass vaccination. Except for tennis star Novak Djokovic, Canada, like the rest of the world answered the call to vaccinate. Just when we think we have cleared the hurdle, two reports remind us that the virus is still hiding under bridges, like speed cops in South Africa. l  On June 13, Justin Trudeau, Canada’s Prime Minister reported he tested COVID-19 positive. l  On 22 June, Heather Stefanson, premier of Manitoba, one of the Canadian provinces reported she has COVID-19. We know their status because they are public figures. Maybe our friends, colleagues, shoppers at the hardware store, church members or people we work with, also have COVID-19. We don’t know. Because we vaccinated en masse , we are not monitoring government and World Health Organization (WHO) updates about the devious virus, as we used t

Canada is a collection of identities that form the national identity. Meaning? Let’s explore. "It’s hard when being Native means different things depending on who’s asking and why,” he says. “And to some people, you’ll never be Native enough,” I add.   Page 55, Fire Keepers Daughter, by Angeline Boulley. Identity is like coins. It has two faces, the interior and exterior. The interior is the most important. It’s the foundation, the bullet proof vest or parka to shied the child from the exterior onslaught. Having said that, we must admit that the exterior can be a blizzard that threatens to erode the interior. Time and place. We are born somewhere but might end up living somewhere else. The question of interior identity vs exterior identity doesn’t come up where you are surrounded by people who look like you, talk like you, live with grandparents like you or have pets like you. It becomes an issue when you move away from the center to a ballpark where people see race first, before

Recycling. Is the pandemic over? It depends on wishful thinking, especially when we rewind to pandemic fatigue that embraced us for the last two years. Loosely defined, COVID-19 fatigue comes from being at home and not outside, in places that give us joy and peer validation. It’s easier to blame the virus for the frustration but we know the truth. Home is not fulfilling, despite the corner house with a pond or penthouse condominium, expensive furniture, German automobiles,   Martha’s vineyard, a second home in Miami, gadgets for every vegetable and the latest digital toys . Home is just an airport where we refuel while waiting for the next flight out of Toronto Pearson International Airport, Berlin Tegel Airport, LAX, John F. Kennedy, London Heathrow, Ministro Pistarini  International in Argentina, or Cairo International. The pandemic exposed us like the frog’s butt, to use a Zulu proverb. Staying at home dismantles the fallacy that it’s a warm place, with people we love and who love u

Spray bottles and masks are the main pandemic items that will increase in value, and sold at auction houses like Sotheby’s for millions of dollars. Why? Historical value. They will tell future generations about a virus called COVID-19 and how it clanged shut the world, like a prison door. Spray bottles are bad news for the environment because the guns cannot be recycled. Yes, they should be called guns in plastic bottles. We overlooked that during the height of the pandemic and used sanitizers, shops and buildings placed at the entrance. Cleaners don’t see it that way for a good reason. They only have two hands. One holds the bottle and the other the follow-up rag. Hotels, public toilets, office buildings and shopping malls have difficult to reach areas. That is where the spray bottle comes in handy. Besides, the high voltage cleaning the pandemic demanded, spray bottles represent our midnight side. We are violent by nature. We seek power. Billionaires have it because they buy oil befo

Voyage trunks carrying possessions from Europe.  Found new possessions in Africa called slaves. Being a servant is not a race thing. That is why it is disconcerting that in this century, publishers still insist that maids, drivers and building caretakers should be black. Being a servant is a class thing. Television series such as Upstairs   Downstairs  and Downton Abbey  have white servants, but we don’t regard them as white. They are workers born in a particular period in England, a class society divided into families related to the Queen, and masses of underlings born to ‘serve’ that upper class, hence the word servant. Being a servant became a race, when England changed to Great Britain. It became great after the royal family stole countries known as colonies, and decided that the colour of defeated nations is inferior, and as such should be servants. Richard Pryor, the American comedian said white people arrived as people from Europe, then decided they were white when they saw blac

Canadians and Americans abroad, beware. Certain activity that is fun in Miami during Spring Break might be a crime abroad. Worse still, it might lead to death. We still see online reports of murdered tourists and perpetrators are not brought to justice because of porous legal systems. Respect narcotics, cultural, religious and health laws of the countries you visit. That is the bottom line. The NBA was emphatic about it at the beginning of the pandemic. Vaccinate against COVID-19 if you want to play basketball in Canada.   Some players refused. Consequently, they did not see action. It’s a health law of the land, said the NBA. Vaccinate or forget about games played at the Scotiabank Arena  in Toronto. Canadians and Americans abroad should remember that their embassies cannot help them if they break foreign law. It might be written or unwritten law. Therefore, certain sexual activity that is not shunned in Canada and America, might be a taboo in certain countries. Poor countries are vul