Anger Management

 There are substitutes for the phrase, ‘That’s b--t.’

We agree. And disagree. We say, ‘That’s b..t’ when we want to express what we firmly believe in or what we think is the truth. This phrase is used all the time in certain age groups, entertainment places and initiation, where initiates use it to demonstrate allegiance to a group. Indeed, lovers use it when love is on the wane.

However, we need substitutes because we are off-shore most of the time: we are at work. Use of that phrase might have repercussions at the next meeting or promotion opportunity.

We are also somewhere, in places of business, where service is shoddy and attitude towards us is toxic. ‘That’s b…t’ is also prevalent among friends, which can lead to the end of the friendship or fist fights.

We need substitutes because the only thing we agree on is the sun, the moon and death. The rest is up for debate and we must learn to disagree without pulling this phrase from the shelf.

1. Let’s put it this way……

2. Please hear me out……

3. I don’t think we’re on the same page….

4. What are the facts though ….

5. Let’s hear all sides of the story …….

6. A lot has changed though …..

7. In my experience …….

8. I’m not comfortable with that ……

9. I know where you’re coming from but ….

10. That won’t work for me…..

11. Numbers don’t lie ….

12. That’s a blanket statement though ….

13. Let’s step back and revisit it some other time …

All languages have substitutes for ‘That’s b…t.’ Indeed, proverbs and idioms are railways to transport feelings or passionate conviction without using this phrase.

These are just suggestions. It might not ease the tension in real life because someone might be set in his ways and continues to use the phrase, which is like a rock. We need substitutes because we cannot afford to have four people with rocks, whether it’s at work, home, or hanging out with friends.  

By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.