Raptors and Approved Baskets

Pic: Nonqaba waka Msimang

Basketball players understand banking more than some of us because of the word APPROVED. They don’t cross their fingers at the electronic banking machine at the mall. Will I get $20 for gas?

They throw a ball and the only sound they want from the basket is approved. Hitting the rim and sliding off is bad news, like a bank computer telling you: INSUFFICIENT FUNDS. How do I know that? Long story.

Nick Nurse, Toronto Raptors head coach and his coaching team must revisit APPROVED, otherwise we might miss the playoffs. Enemies of the people have unlocked Pascal Siakam’s deposits, so it’s time for him to change the locks. All bank deposits must be approved. Sorry, basket deposits. Impossible? Delete that. Let’s say most, not all.

Bank deposits are either hard cash (dinosaur) or electronic. Same with b’ball. Rebounds must be accepted. Deposits from the corner store - my favourite - must swipe that net.

Off-shore deposits as in Matt Thomas must be basket approved. Head-on collision at the traffic lights as per Kyle Lowry and Rondae Hollis-Jefferson, his royal highness (RHJ) must go in. Stolen merchandise must also be approved by the basket, as in O.G. Anunoby borrowing the ball from a distracted visiting player.  

Raptors will feel the strain with the absence of Fred VanVleet because not only is he a good bank manager as a point guard, he has incredible approved basket deposits, as well.

APPROVED was in short supply in December 2019. That is why Toronto Raptors stumbled and fell to teams like the New York Knicks, Miami Heat, Houston Rockets etc.

Yesterday’s loss to the LA Clippers is just another example of INSUFFICIENT FUNDS. The account is in the red. Toronto Raptors need to score. All baskets must be approved. Nick Nurse knows how, so, Do The Right Thing, to tweak Spike Lee’s movie.

By: Nonqaba waka Msimang.