Feng shui

a novel about feng shui and misconceptions.

I must avoid Norwood Books at the Norwood Mall because I always mess up my meagre budget with unplanned books.  That is how I came home with Alice Walker’s, Now is the Time to Open Your Heart, one of the longest book titles in the world. 

I put aside Manil Suri’s book, The Death of Vishnu for another day and dived into Alice Walker.  I applied some brakes when I came to the part about feng shui, and clearing the clutter in your life.  I don’t know what feng shui is but I’m at home with the word clutter.

I’m partial to food so the kitchen was the first stop for the clutter research, the shelf where I keep the pots and pans, to be precise.  What is surprising is that tin foil containers that came with certain food from the deli or supermarket are more than the pots.  Why do I keep them? 

Ah!  Recycling!  I wanted to do my bit for the environment and use them again.  The problem is that the deli will be scandalized if I take these back and ask them to use them for whatever food I might buy.

Now let’s see what is in the kitchen drawer where I keep dish towels and place mats.  There is a manual for a cordless steam iron I gave away because it was more aggravation than my old iron with the mangled cord. 

Another manual!  This is for an electric frying pan.  Do I have one?  This is the result of plastic money, which enables me to buy things I don’t need.  I brandish my credit card before the cashier says, “Cash or charge?”

At least the dish towel drawer has dish towels.  Here’s one with vibrant red and green chillies.  It is made from linen because the tag here says ‘leinen 50% baumwolle 50%.’  What language is that?  I also have a bright one which looks like a poor cousin of Scottish tartan. 

I seem to also have a few ones made from fabric that is soft like a towel.  Why am I keeping these paper serviettes/napkins from pizza, curry, and fish and chips take-aways?  Next time I go there I’ll say, “No serviettes and plastic cutlery please.”  They’ll think I’m pazzo (mad in Italian).

What is this?  It is an e-mail print-out with a recipe for jerk chicken.  My friend Denise sent it from Canada with a note. “I got this recipe from the internet.  Search darling, search.  Information is only a click away.”   

That was in 2000.  Our e-mail addresses have changed and I have been clicking ever since.  So, why am I keeping this print-out?

Now back to Alice Walker and her book with a mile-long title for some relaxation.  De-cluttering is exhausting.