Exclusion From Christmas Dinner

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COVID-19 and this Christmas. The virus kills. Others survive. Government and health experts caution, trim down year-end gatherings to reduce funerals and cremations.

People with common sense understand that, but the practical side is bound to dent family relationships. Christmas dinner for example. It was bigger last year, has always been bigger. Who do we exclude from the dinner table this year?

I’m using this meal because I’m writing from a North American perspective. People celebrate Christmas differently all over the world. Millions are not even Christians. They regard the holiday as a venue for a pause, a pause from work and hustling in general.

Grandmothers and grandfathers will be excluded for obvious reasons. They are perceived as high risk carriers because their bodies are fatigued, from other ailments.

Excluding them is a painful decision for most families. The pain is acute because of the Thanksgiving experience. They did not fetch old people from care homes.

Who else will be excluded from the Christmas dinner? Dilemma. I will feel worthless if I’m excluded. Why was my cousin’s family invited and mine was not? It shouldn’t be.

The excluder feels worse. She knows that the exclusion will imply price tags. This family member is more important than that one. We need sympathy for the excluder. She didn’t invite her own parents because of COVID-19. What could be more painful than that?

Teenagers and independent single adults are thrilled to bits. Some of them hate the obligation to go to their parents’ house Christmas Day.

This is another ‘written podcast’ by Nonqaba waka Msimang.

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