Dinner With A Cellphone

Paris cafés are famous for people watching.  That is why they are popular with writers scouting for characters.  They are by no means Simone de Beauvoir and Jean Paul Sartre, but they call themselves writers nonetheless. 

The cellphone has come to their rescue.  They don’t have to book a flight and disembark at Roissy Airport, to get character ideas.  They just wear their designer sunglasses and observe people on their phones, especially dinner dates.  Typical scene.

1.       She-date confidently follows restaurant host to reserved table, he-date scrolls down his phone.

2.       Here’s the menu, your waiter will be with you shortly, thank you says she-date, he-date is still engaged.  

3.       She-date: Toyima my girlfriend told me about this place.  Look at the high ceilings.

4.       She-date: Yes.  We are ready to order.

5.       She-date:  Oh! Him?  He’ll have the same. 

6.       She-date:  I have a new hair colour.  It’s red.  Did you notice?

7.       She-date:  Hmmm! The food is here. Look at that!

8.       She-date:  Office politics drive me crazy.  I’m thinking of starting my own business.

9.       She-date:  Thank you.  The food was the bomb.  No.  No dessert.

10.   She-date:  Honey.  I’ll be right back.

Thirty minutes later.  The restaurant host asks the he-date to vacate the table because their dinner is over.

He-date:  What do you mean?  I’m having dinner with my girlfriend.

Restaurant Host:  She paid the bill and left.

©Nonqaba waka Msimang.