Mirror! Mirror! Am I Beautiful?

Hotels and bathroom mirrors.  Do they have to be so big, so shiny?
I freak out when I go to hotels because mirrors are everywhere.  Who told them that we love looking at ourselves in the mirror?  It’s pure torture.  It is enough to make me suicidal.
People take extra care when they know they will check into a hotel.  Hair is done, nails done, smooth chins courtesy of Braun electric shavers, no grey nose hairs winking at passers-by, clean underwear for a change and credit cards that will not lead to embarrassment.
All that confidence gets a technical knock-out when they decide to take a bath or shower because mirrors reveal the truth, the naked truth.
Very few people love seeing themselves below their face.  That is why passport and I.D. photos are strictly faces only.   Super models are cool with their bodies because they have water for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and lettuce, when they dine out. 
Actresses too.  They have personal trainer bodies because they are still hoping for a juicy part, just one part that will make them part of movie or television history.
Restaurants are very unhappy when they see celebrities because they are bad for business.  Period. But what can they do?  They grin and bear it for the sake of publicity for their eating establishments, but that is another story.
Sorry.  My bad!  Back to bathroom mirrors.  A real killjoy!  That is why guests should have options and be allowed to choose rooms with or without bathroom mirrors.
Well!  Not without, but with smaller mirrors.  Hotels could drill two mirrors the size of the full moon in bathrooms.  This would allow guests to admire their beautiful faces, the result of Estee Lauder or Clinique ‘age defying’ products. 
Men would admire their faces, the result of all those grooming tips from magazines such as Men’s Health.
Guests who are comfortable with their bodies because they are under 21 or have ‘fixed’ anything below their chins can have the full bathroom mirror.
It would be interesting to conduct a survey on the choice of mirrors.
“Full bathroom mirror or moon mirrors sir?” says the front desk person who is having a bad day.

Nonqaba waka Msimang is the author of Sweetness the Novel.


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